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A poignant piece by a mom, struggling to grip the grief and hind sight of missing an elusive opportunity to save a child from a devil she could’t control.
Expectations, A Poem by Mom vs Addiction
You have to let go of the child you once knew in the future,
The one who would without question attend college, have lots of friends, smile easily, do effortless back-flips, surrounded by the promise fog of youth.
The one whose very personality used to validate you and make others think you were so much smarter and together than you ever were.
Now that same child calls everything into question, and provides the kindling for others to re-draw you; you worked too much, weren’t home enough, didn’t take her to the right doctor soon enough, weren’t strict enough, didn’t see the signs, live in the city, believe in the wrong God, didn’t accept help that no one is really offering.
No one wants to know what you know—that we are all vulnerable, living in a house of cards. Now you know that there are places so painful, so agonizing that you can’t blame anyone for excusing themselves politely from your experience.
You would run so fast, too, if only the road didn’t lead you away from your very heart.
Life goes on and you are left alone with the certainty that as you meticulously rebuild, careful to place the cards just right, in balance with your new reality, you dare not hope for too much, they will fall again.
It is easy to have high expectations for a teen coming home from some kind of treatment for their addiction, but what they need to know, is how important they are to their recovery — that failure is not the end and success is up to them. Substance use disorder creates stress for a family and there is no guarantee of the outcome of recovery without diligence. You know who your teen is. What comes after treatment is more work. Finding ways to deal with it are critical. There are resources everywhere and the web is a good place to start, even to find a meeting. There are also, ways for the whole family to just “be” that enhances the success of a teen’s recovery. To see a 9 point list of what I recommend for a family welcoming home an addicted loved one, CLICK HERE.
Here is an opportunity to hear the author of Tales of Addiction and four other books on addiction and healing speak about her experiences. Barbara Sinor chronicles the stories of addicts in Tales of Addiction including her own experience of losing a son to alcoholism. Listen to Barabara speak about her personal struggles as she shares the lessons she has learned from her own family and work in healing others. Link by Barbara Sinor
John Marohn’s web
site, Recovery Journey, A Process; Not a Destination is also the title of his book. His website offers an interesting view into his writing. You can check out his great collection of mini books on recovery called ebooklets. They can be downloaded in seconds to be read on line.
Inspiration for Recovery is new Blog with great articles, books, and inspiration!; to further your healing and recovery from life’s traumas, passages, and addictions. Barbara Sinor is the author of five books. She is a Psycho-spiritual Therapist with a background in metaphysics. Be a fellow adventurer on the journey toward peace and compassion. Visit Inspiration For Recovery
The Media Awareness Project – Drug News Archives link by Mary S.
Psych Central is the Internet’s largest and oldest independent mental health social network. It made Time Magazine’s top 50 websites. It is run by MH professionals, offering sound information and over 150 support groups to nearly 1 million people around the world every month. You can find information on dual diagnosis, addictions, depression and subjects like suicide which like a tragic drug overdose death can leave loved ones stunned and feeling blame ♦ e-How site offers info on addiction and related topics, including a video library. Links by Mary S.
“The pain and suffering of addiction is not limited to the alcoholic or drug addict. Family members share a tremendous burden as well” – Ed Hughes, MPS Read his guide list: 10 Ways Family Members Can Help a Loved One With a Drug of Alcohol Problem Book by Ed Hughs and Ronald Turner.
Interesting article posted at, RECOVERY HELPDESK bringing attention to the seriousness of detoxing off opiates while in jail and a wrongful death lawsuit.
Web browsing through the myriad of information on addiction, education and prevention efforts lead to four more blogs definitely worth your visit
G.O.A.L , Global Outreach For Addiction Leadership • Pill Talk, an Entertaining Pharmacy Blog • Why Do I do What I Don’t Want to Do?, Relapse Coaching and Prevention • Swallow, The Blog of Record on The Painkiller Epidimic
Prescription Addiction Radio is a website that hammers on what high percentage of opiate addiction really stems from. That is prescription pain medication grossly over-marketed and abused in America, impacting people in all walks of life. I won’t describe the reasons for saying this, because this website does it very well. I am, however, amazed after listening to the audio files that it contains. It is a real ear opener and well worth anyone’s time who is interested in understanding why America is impacted so heavily by addiction. You can also view a nationwide online petition to ban oxycontin in this link.
Actually this blog is called: Highs Lows Crack. A UK mother fed up to her eyeballs about the scourge of addiction, writes a poignant pissed off piece called: Baby to Bastard in 32 Years. Surely many parents will relate to this and many other truth-isms in this blog; coming to terms to the reality of tough love and saving the hair follicles. Have a story or an interesting blog you want to share; send it to DadonFire Submissions
Very creative and proactive blog. Check out Sober Bones right here.
Its the $64,000 question. The Answer lies in the human brain and perhaps in Joe Herzanek’s Blog: Why don’t they just Quit? All families of addicts have asked this question. Considering the eight million drug addicts in America, it’s probably been asked eight billion times. Joe’s website; Changing Lives Foundation is a great resource and obviously part of the solution. Well worth viewing; Joe’s websites fuel for the fire needed to battle the scourge of addiction.
Oxycontin & Opiate Addiction: A Mother’s Story • Blinded for Love for J • An Addict in Our Son’s Bedroom • Mom of Opiate Addicted Son Many thanks for sharing these personal journeys into the world of addiction and recovery.
DRUG WAR FACTS. CLICK HERE
http://www.drugwarfacts.org/cms/
Drug War Facts provides reliable information with applicable citations on important public health and criminal justice issues. It is updated continuously by its editor, Douglas A. McVay.
Most charts, facts and figures are from government sources, government-sponsored sources, peer reviewed journals and occasionally newspapers. In all cases the source is cited so that journalists, scholars and students can verify, check context and obtain additional information.
For the parents of teenagers and young adults lost in the world of addiction. For parents lost in their own relentless search for answers. Archived in the “Blogs and Resources” category drop-down menu:
Top 100 Blogs on Recovery • Oxycontin & Opiate Addiction • The Needle and the Damage Done, Thoughts from the mother of a heroin addict • Mom vs Heroin
For families and individuals impacted by the world of addiction and recovery. Here are a few good blogs that touch the soul and open doors.
Dryblog • The Junky’s Wife • The Discovering Alcoholic • Mother to an Addict • Cocaine Widow • Take 12 Recovery Radio • I’m Fine • Breaking the Silence
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